On my holidays I…
If like the rest of the British public, you decided to head to the coast for the bank holiday - a jolly big woo yay to you!
I went down to Cornwall and had a very smashing time. I saw that woman who presents daytime TV show “This Morning” in a fudge shop in Padstow. I am reliably informed that her name is actually Fern Britton. It was very reassuring to see that she had no make up on, greasy hair and looked - well, just like most ordinary people do on a Sunday morning! Whale said I should have taken a picture and sent it into Hello (whale edit: heat, actually ducks) magazine. Damnit.
I also had to take a picture of this:
It’s a boot dog and adorns a shop in Padstow. I want one!
I did also go to Newquay during the holiday, but the sheer presence of hen & stag night parties in the town made me want to run away very quickly. I did manage to go swimming…well, if you call being chucked about by the waves swimming - then that’s what I did. I also found out that I have bought possibly *the* most useless bikini and flashed my tits to most of the beach (well, I expect they were used to it with all the hen nights). But I am most annoyed, as all the shops have now stopped selling them and I am going on holiday in October. *sniff*.
